Eight years ago, the E*TRADE Baby retired as E*TRADE’s spokesperson. Since then, the world of personal finance has only gotten more confusing. Inflation is up. Savings are down. And even we can’t explain some of the things that pass for “investments” these days (and we run an investment platform!) So, we sent two executives to the E*TRADE Baby’s retirement cabin to bring him back and help get people’s finances under control. At first, he was reluctant, but once he heard people were taking investing advice from memes, he knew he had to get back to work.